5 Deadly Venoms = win

Other stuff for School that i did this term...yay accomplishments


5 Deadly Venoms

Introduction: Ok so this is an old kung fu movie from 1978. The plot is centered on 5 Poison clan members, and a final under trained pupil. I love this movie for its massive depth; I will attempt to wrap your heads around the basic premise of this film, without ruining the awesomeness of it. The first scene contains massive amount of expository, with the master of the poison clan instructing the last pupil he will ever have. He has a few final wishes that need to be carried out after he dies. He wants the pupil to check up on all of his students, he also wants all the money made by the poison clan to go to charity.

“What I taught them, could be used wrongly, for evil, to hurt men.”

The Poison clan master is dying of old age/too much poison and fears that what he taught his students is being used to carry out evil. So he sends his last student, who isn’t fully trained, to find them and stop them if they are doing wrong. This little element adds a layer of complexity later in the film as when he starts encountering the 5 clansmen you (as an audience) and him (the last student) don’t know who is good or bad.

There are 5 main styles in the poison clan: #1 Centipede, #2 Snake, #3 Scorpion, #4 Lizard, #5 Toad. The different styles are important as these are the only concrete clues he will have to identify them. The styles are even defined by certain moves and characteristics that are shown in this opening expository scene.

“He practiced the centipede style….in fact the speed he moves was as fast as a centipede.” He is really fast, like Bruce Lee.

“Number two, he practiced the snake style…..snake style is known for its incredible agility, agility and speed.” This guy can like jump really high and does you know, snake stuff. His style is the lamest in my opinion.

“Now the my third pupil, number three, he practiced the scorpion style, which resembles a scorpion pincer and tail.” He can like grab stuff and kick stuff behind him, and he holds his hands up like lobster claws when he fights.

“Number four, he practiced the lizard style. The lizard style is a very agile and nimble style, its particularly effective at climbing.” This guy can scale walls with ease.

“Toad style is immensely strong and immune to nearly any weapon. When it’s used properly, it’s almost invincible.” If you think you have heard that somewhere before you have. But anyways this guy cannot be cut by swords, and spears just break on him. He is a super bad ass.

The Poison clan master also details which clansmen knew each other, because they would always wear a mask while training to avoid their identities being known. #1 and #2 were friends and trained with #3 but didn’t know #3. Pupils 4 and 5 came after the first 3 but knew each other. This is important because there are essentially two groups of 2 and 1 rogue

Now that this is a blog i can just show you!


The last pupil is given this information and expected to sort it out. Good thing I don’t have too, this stuff sounds confusing. But wait it gets harder. The 5 clansmen will be very hard to find, of course nobody knows what they look like, so he gives him (the last student) a final clue. He gives him the name of a city in which a former poison clan instructor is living in, as he doesn’t know his name or his exact whereabouts; one could argue that its not much of a clue at all. He says that the poison clan made him very rich (“enough to make them(the five clansmen) all rich for life”), and he thinks that the 5 will try to get the former master's money. The current poison clan master indicates that he is living very quietly in this small village; he also wants the pupil to convince the former master to donate the money to a charity. Never once does the pupil look discouraged by this task, a stark contrast to a modern day film like Lord of the Rings; where Frodo (Elijah Wood) is very intimidated by the epic task set before him.
And that concludes the opening expository scene. This is the main reason why I love this movie, it has lots of layers like the film fight club, but it doesn’t blatantly deceive you. It gives you all the information up front, so if you watch the film again, there are clear yet subtle giveaways as to who is who. Important details that you could have caught the first time through if your brain wasn't rotten from watching lame american TV (See Discovery Channel).

The Sociological/political approach

1. Characters and their class: The main characters are the 5 clansmen and the 1 final student. 2 of the clansmen are upper/ruling class types; these are also the evil doers of the clan and authority figures in some cases. Perhaps suggesting how Chinese film makers feel about the rich and wealthy. 2 other clansmen are from the upper middle working class, they have hardworking jobs but their skill of kung fu allows them to be the best at what they do. This detail, I think, hints towards the classic (stereotypical?) Chinese view that hard work and practice pays off. The last clansman is from the lower class along with the final student. The trained clansman is able to get by because of his expertise, but the student is just plain poor. The middle and lower class characters often display a severe lack of trust in authority figures, mainly the police.

2. Social classes and their interactions: In one scene the lower class clansman is eating in the restaurant (small town there is only one). The poor student has no money and is looking longingly at the other restaurant patrons through a window on the street. Somebody who works for the restaurant attempts to shoo this 'beggar' away. The clan member sees this and says, “Are you hungry,” and tosses him a piece of silver. The student, delighted at the thought of a full stomach, rushes into the resturant to join the clansman (keep in mind they have no idea who is who at this point). The clansman tells the student he can’t sit at his table as he is expecting company. The student sits at another table and orders his food. This scene illustrates a reverberating theme in this movie; that being charitable is good and positive value. The clansman expresses sympathy for the poor beggar and extends a helping hand, however he will not let him join him at his table. This detail would suggest to me that the film makers thought that people who receive charitable donations should not try to extrude more out of a person who has given them something. In essence, he gives him a meal but doesn’t invite him into the privacy of his own home to eat it.

3. What is important to the characters? One thing that is undeniably important to all the characters involved is money. However the different social classes express different ideas as to how it should be spent. The upper class clansmen want it so they will be “rich for life,” the others want it so they can right the wrongs that the poison clan is responsible for; and then donate the rest to a charity. These 2 opposing views (one belonging to the upper class and one to the lower/middle) are the driving emotional factor behind the characters motivations and actions. One side standing for selflessness and doing what’s right, while the other stands for nothing greater than personal gain.

4. Traditional values: We all, as Americans, have many preconceived notions as to what “traditional Chinese values” are. (Insert anti-communist rhetoric here) However upon analyzing this film my original notions where challenged: That all Chinese are devoutly devoted to the government and their cause, and that they value being a wealthy and powerful nation. But in this film the ‘cool’ and good characters (who are all lower or middle class) have a rather opposing outlook. They are very distrusting of authority, especially when it comes to the police and the court system. They do show respect to their poison clan master, who is also their elder, but ultimately don’t trust his motivations and aspirations. My view of how they value money and wealth has also shifted. It would seem they value giving away wealth as much as having it. How many American films have you seen where the protagonists strive the whole movie to obtain something only to give it away to a more worthy possessor at the very end.

Wu-Massacre Album

So the Wu-Tang Clan is my favorite music group. Their lyrical content is much deeper than people usually associate with most hip-hop. They confront a lot of societal issues in their rhymes, this is often done under layers and layers of slang, so it takes a trained ear to take it all in. I view this style of music as a novel and others as picture books, there is just soooooo much more content within this rap than in other music, many songs don't even have a hook, its just straight rhyming for 4 min. The use of metaphor is extremely prevalent, for example in the bible there is a passage where its describing Jesus speaking and it says that "Now out of His mouth goes a sharp sword, that with it He should strike the nations" This is of course not interpreted literally, but rather they interpret is as the sword it symbolic to the tongue, and that his words were powerful enough to "strike" a nation. And all members of the wu-tang clan are Muslims! That is another thing that draws me to this music, they are very spiritually diverse people. They are into Buddhism and other eastern religions as well as having a lot of knowledge about the younger religions, and all of this makes it into their music. Chess is another topic that is referenced a lot through the use of metaphor, Bobby Diggs and Gary Grice play a lot in particular.

You can see the Gza (gary grice) and the DJ from Cypress Hill playing chess on this album cover. The album is even named Grandmasters after what you would call supreme chess players.

The main thing that stood out to me after i purchased this album is that the majority of the clan isn't present. Clifford Smith(aka Method Man), Dennis Coles(aka Ghostface Killah), and Corey Woods(aka Raekwon) are the featured artists, other members may do one verse on a track but in large part they are not involved. This is different from most of their albums where all of the nine members are featured on tracks throughout.

Wu-Tangs music is important to me on 2 fronts, one its just awesomely crafted hip-hop, and two its very progressive in terms of social equality and moving the hip-hop genre forward. So I guess that is 3 fronts. A good example of the former is how Robert Diggs (aka Rza) crafts the beat around the sound of the voice of whomever may be rhyming at that particular time. He views the voice as an instrument also and adjusts the beat accordingly, for example, Ghostface has a higher pitched delivery than the rest of the clan, and Rza will change the beat up a little when he jumps in on a track to contrast with the sound of his voice better and make his lyrics stand out. For Ghost usually the base is amplified and the high pitch loop toned down, for Ugod (Lamont Hawkins), who has the deepest voice, the base will be featured less as to not clash with his booming voice. Its subtle aspects like that that gives the music a sense of depth not found in most hip-hop. Their target audience is almost always inner city kids, a lot of them came up in single parent homes and every album they have released there is always a part or verse where they express sympathy for all the single mothers out there. There music for the most part is rather uplifting, a stark contrast to the negative connotation that people usually associate with rap. There is one track of the album that is a great example of this, and plus they sampled a 17 year old Michael Jackson for the hook, which is just as classic as you can get for hip-hop.

I would say that this album is excellent, although, I am a proud member of the Wu-Tang cult, so I will admit that i am biased. My only critique would be that Def Jam record label produced the majority of this album so i would have to say that the beats aren't all up to the high standards that Rza imposes when Wu-Tang makes independent albums. The quality of the lyrics and the use of metaphor is an ever present aspect of the Wu's music, that I would say is the albums greatest strength, but you could apply that to all of their work. One thing that made it memorable for me is how they initially promoted the album. Its quite unique and creative and just adds to the splendor that is the wu-tang clan.



I should point out that all the members of the Wu have about 10 different aliases that they go by, Method Man is often called Tical, which is slang for marijauana on Staten Island, and he used to smoke a lot of weed. They call Ghostface Tony Starks after the comic book character Ironman. Starks is, as we all know now thanks to those awesome movies, a very savvy business man, as is Dennis Coles. Raekwon is called 'The Chef' by all the other clan members because, "He is always cooking up some marvelous shit that make your mouth water." Now this is a take on the movie seven, but they crimes commited are actually from a little skit they did on their first album from the 90s. WARNING EXPLICIT CONTENT AHEAD!

People tend to take stuff like that very seriously, however I was laughing the first time I heard it, and i wasn't the only one.

They fallowed this up with the only music video that they did for the album, and i must say you dont really see this quality amongst hip hop music videos. Although they did manage to get everything that you would normally see in a rap video in, but what can I say, they are giving the people what they want. Here is the video and a behind the scenes cut to help you all make sense of it. And this is actually about the same song as above, I just love the creativity that they display in all of this, I think its a great example of how the Wu is on another level in terms of the quality of what they put out there.


To me their music is so compelling and I really want to throw my support behind them so that they can continue to make it, and I have. I have purchased over 50 albums from them, each member of the clan has some sort of solo career, although other Wu-Tang members often appear on the album with them, even though it isn't under the Wu-Tang flag so to speak. What I'm getting at is these guys make music, a lot of music, and I buy every album as soon as they come out. To sum up how I feel about the Wu is that I have a lot of respect for people who come from a very poor background and rise up above all of it to make something great out of themselves.

I could explain further but why not get it straight from the clan!!! The guy standing up is ODB, he died in 2004 of a cocaine overdose. He is basically the Kirk Morrison of hip-hop.

ESPN the mag

ESPN.com

ESPN is essentially a news agency except the only focus is sports. It has become so widely exalted that most news networks barely cover sports at all. That being said, every story in ESPN The Mag, or on the site, is about sports or has some connection to sports. The magazine is organized into sections; first there are a bunch of short commentaries from their bloggers, those are usually followed by some long and deep articles. The final portion of the magazine is organized by sport: baseball, football, basketball etc... The magazine is in full color and is very large for a magazine, it's about the size of the Rocky Mountain News we saw in class. For a major publication it has a lot of photos, usually the longer articles will have a lower photo per word ratio. One of the things that draws me to it is that there are very few adds compared to other magazines, and most of the ones that do make it in are for clothes companies. Most of them seem relevant; I would buy those labels' products if I wasn't so poor, I mostly just shop at Ross Dress for Less. The main difference between the mag and the website is that the site gets updated probably over 100 times a day, by all the various bloggers across the country that write for it. All the articles that appear in the mag are written solely for the mag, however when the issue is first released they will have the feature article posted on the site for everybody to read. The main focus of the magazine seems to take a much deeper look into the sports world, where as the site's main purpose is to report stuff as soon as it happens. The mag tries to write articles that want to be timeless, addressing a social issue within the sports world, like steroid use. The website however operates on a much more neutral level and tries to remain objective in its sports reporting, it does have a lot of opinion columns and blogs though.

The biggest difference between the two is that this magazine appears to target a younger internet savvy audience, unlike sporting news and sports illustrated, ESPN The Mag rarely covers golf. Baseball even gets a lot less run that other publications, and during football season that is pretty much all the mag will be about, which I love!!!! The biggest strength of the mag I think is the little ticker that runs along the bottom of each page, it has random sports facts that I can never seem to find anywhere else. I would have to say that the sites greatest asset is that it updates constantly, I will sometimes check the site 10 times in a day. And 9 times out of 10 it seems like there is something new. For me, I would have to say that the biggest short comings for both publications would have to be that they don't devote the majority of their time to football!!! I do go to other full time football sites but they aren't the same high quality that ESPN delivers. So yea more football, and more Green Bay Packers!!!!

As I mentioned above, it would seem that the target audience is for the a.d.d. youth of today, as opposed to old timers who play golf or watch baseball all day. The adds seem to reflect this, brands like Captain Morgan and Perry Ellis are regular contributors. I wouldn't say that there are any offensive messages, but there is all kinds of jock stereotyping going on. Although i don't think that there is a sports magazine in the world that you couldn't apply that to.

I personally prefer the online version, the fact that it is free has a lot to do with this. And I think that the website serves it audience better as there is 10 times the content and its all updated so rapidly.

Another reason that I like the online version is the forums. I'm a regular poster on there, especially when it comes to Mike Vick. When ever there is an article posted about him a ton of people leave messages like, "I hope you break your leg and ruin your career!" or "I hope something bad happens to him." And first off I'm a dog person, I'm very good with dogs and I watched the dog whisperer all the time when I had the nat geo channel. Now I'm not condoning his actions in any way but it's like people forget that he went to a FEDERAL PRISON for 18 months and lost every penny he had ever earned. Peoples polarization over killing/torturing dogs seems so irrational to me where there are other people in the league who killed other PEOPLE and nobody seems to care. Leonard Little killed a motorist while driving drunk (BAC of .19, the legal limit is .08) and then was a douche about it and got another DWI 5 years later. Most people nowadays don't even know who he is even though he was on those Rams Super Bowl teams. Ray Lewis, is lucky that the only person who maintained that he was a murderer was also an ex-con. So I don't know, the outrage over Mike Vick just seems disproportionate and irrational. After all he paid a much higher price than that of people who killed another human being and people are still saying that they wish he had been executed. It just seems as if there are so many other people who are more deserving of their ire but receive very little if any national negative attention. Donte Stallworth only went to jail for 30 days after killing somebody!!!! I mean c'mon w.t.f.!?!?! Oh, and I cant forget Ben Rothlisburger getting off of a rape(s) charge because the girl and all her friends were "intoxicated."

The main thing that I learned is that once I have a computer connected to my toilet I will never need another magazine again.

What happened to the Discovery Channel?

This...

So for this week I watched a 'prime time' show and why not watch one from my favorite childhood station, the Discovery Channel. Unfortunately this is what i found in their 8 o'clock slot on a Friday. Gold Rush is a reality TV show based in Alaska(discovery channel and the history channel have a serious hard on for Alaska at the moment(its tougher in Alaska, ice road truckers, the fishing/crabbing show, and now a new airplane ice road truckers)) that centers around 7 or 8 miners who purchased a claim up in Alaska with the intent to mine gold. So its not like Ive been watching the whole series but this is what i managed to pick up from this one episode. After 3 months of 'mining' they have yielded zero gold out of this location and burned up the $250,000 they had to initially invest in this place. One thing is very clear, not one of these people has ever mined for gold or has any expertise with this equipment. Hell they don't even have a clue how to work half the stuff. But that makes it fun, cause seeing people fail at stuff makes me feel better about myself!

This show features entirely blue collar types, most of these guys could walk on to the set of Ax Men and we would never notice. This seems to be part of an undeniable trend (see above Alaska shows) toward putting working class people on TV as opposed to dressed up, white collar, news caster types. I think that this is an attempt to appeal to the lower/lower middle class and come off as being a down to earth channel, cause you know it is discovery channel after all. In this one episode the one person who is an indoorsy type (they said he used to be a real estate agent) attempts to learn how to use a complex piece of mining equipment by "reading books and studying", and of course he fails, which is no surprise to all the other more rough cut mountain men.

Well I kind of already talked about it above, but that one incident I believe was very telling about who the show is trying to appeal to. Working class people who's jobs are based on experience and a will to do it, rather than training and book smarts. The real estate agent (Dorsey) seems out of place and the other guys are always trying to figure out something that he can actually do. I saw this as perpetuating the stereo type that people from the city 'cant cut it out here' (one of the men actually says "he just cant cut it out here" i wonder if that line was fed to him....) in the 'real' world. This show reminds me of the WWII era USA, when we built stuff and were a working class nation, it seems to be doing its very best glen beck impersonation when it comes to bringing back the glory days, and then just being crazy.

My major beef with this show is that its a completely obvious why these guys are out here, its not because they actually want to mine, its cause they are on TV. I mean what sane person would invest $250,000 into something that they have no idea how to run or operate. It almost seems like that was the Discovery Channel budget for the show so that's all that they were willing to take out of their money pile, and hey if it doesn't work out the network would have our financial back. These guys all talk about gold mining like they just read it out of a magazine, they all know how stuff is 'supposed' to work, but none of them actually know how to do shit. The drama just seems sooooo manufactured too, almost as if the people on set could hear the overly ominous narrator.

This was the first time Ive ever watched this show, and if I can help it, it will be the last. There is no way that I would ever recommend this to another person who is looking for entertainment. This is such a far cry from the show that I remember being in this same time slot when I was a kid (90s), Wild Discovery, which was nothing more than a documentary series on wild life and stuff. When my mom told me to turn the TV off I would always retort with, "but mom! don't you want me to learn!" Now I don't think any kid could dupe their parents with that one, this stuff inst even close to educational.

This is just sad, as I used to really like the steady stream of documentaries that you got from the history channel and the discovery channel, but now their line ups are littered with stupid reality shows based in Alaska, or worse. They still do documentaries, Planet Earth was awesome, but that used to be an everyday thing for them. Now they are likely to break their arm patting themselves on the back for a documentary like that. The unfortunate reality of the situation is that reality shows are killing quality TV.

Nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of Americans....

Unfortunately this is the slogan that would best define my advertising campaign, if i had one. Its just so true. Here is a good example of how we can be confused by statistics in adds and duped into buying a product that will make our lives "more safe".

This is a Sylvania Silverstar Ultra Headlight commercial. The add is a TV commercial with a run time of about 30 seconds, and its pure class. The background music starts out as crowd noise, to get you in that rowdy "red blooded all American" mood, and then fades into a nice country song to set the caring tone for the rest of the ad. Like I said its pure class, here this is what I'm talking about.



The ad starts out with the "plain-folk" approach, perhaps lulling you into a false sense of security. Then it rattles off some stats about how their head lights are like "50% brighter" and "40% farther" which is good, cause you know you want your head lights to light up stuff. Then it drops the bomb. It prefaces the big bang with this cozy statement, "Why would any fun loving, red blooded, all American male give up watching football to upgrade his head lights?" Then some stats, never mind that they don't bother to mention what they are comparing them to, maybe your burnt out ones. But those aren't the real reasons its because "its easier to replace a couple of head lights then it is...... a daughter" BOOOOOOM!!! You now have to buy these headlights cause if you don't your ditsy daughter wont see shit and will crash and die!!! And there you have it, the "hidden-fear" approach, and we all thought this was just an innocent headlight commercial. I just love how this ad is trying to appeal to "all Americans" and convincing them to act upon their newly developed fear of the dark. I'm personally not a big fan of this type of fear inducing ad, using fear to control people is terrorism in my book. But we can call it fearism for disassociation purposes. It feels that since the whole 9/11 deal its gotten a lot worse.{(EDIT):I just watched all the ads on this site: http://www.livingroomcandidate.org/commercials/1956, and this has been going on a long time, but the 92,96,00(forgive me i was 4,8,12 at the time...) elections focused on a lot of domestic stuff so it didn't have that war time feel like the 04 election did.} I'm pretty sure the greatest president we ever had once said, "The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself" Word.

In spite of how stupid I think this ad is, I do believe this add is very effective, for its target audience.(see title) The first time I saw it I couldn't contain my laughter, its just too easy to appeal to paternal fears in order to sell a product. We have all seen adds like this with a similar message, if you don't get this product your safety(or your child's in this case) is in danger! BUY IT NOW SO YOU CAN FEEL SAFE!!!!!

So what can we all learn from this advertisement? Well I can tell you what I learned, nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of Americans. Ohh and if you gonna get some new headlights better make em silver stars, they are 50% brighter.

Hookers arnt all skanky

Wait, yes they are.

Are you a hooker?

So im sure all my followers are guessing now, is scott a runaway hooker? Well the answer is no, im not, the title was just to catchy to pass up. Im pretty sure that mtv just contacted me and wants to do a spin off show, 16 and hooking. Even though im not a whore, I can still post funny/entertaining stuff like this classic right here.



I first saw that when I was in high school, and to this day, I've never heard another human make a sound anywhere close to that.

Runaway Hooker in the making....

If you have ever sent a message like this to a person that you have never met, you may be a runaway hooker in the making. I just logged into my myspace account for the first time since 2008 and lookie what I found...

I'm Susan :))
I really feel shy, but I have to tell you, Scott Alan Smith, that you are just a man of my dreams... I found your profile by accident but now I'm sure it's a destiny! ))
Frankly speaking... I want to find a man who will help me to realise alpl my fantasies, oh, feel really SO timid to write it... !!! but I mean my $exy fantasies.. ;-))))
your photos are marvellous... but I'm sure in your real life you will excite me even more! ))
that's incredible... but I'm from Corvallis, Oregon United States too! :-))
So... I would like to keep up a friendship with you, Scott Alan Smith!
You can find my spicy photos at my profile!
Scott Alan Smith, I nhope you'll take a look at them and will write me smth to start our challenge :))))
ki$$ you tenderly ;)))

it was probably a man anyways...a big hairy scary man or an asian person who doesnt speak english that well

How to tell if its a real Runaway Hooker

Here is a good educational video that everybody should watch before traveling to the big city.

Learn How to determine if she's a hooker or a cop. For more Dating Advice How-To Videos & Articles, visit WonderHowTo.

See HBO thinks we have an audience

According to a university double blind study, hookers are interesting. That is why HBO made this awesome show about me!